Being Honest.

Being honest, is not the easiest thing to do on the face of this earth. Being honest will reveal the ugly side of who you are and what you have become.

So to be honest, I think i am not going to go anywhere here. I am not doing a good job here? Probably I could, but I did not. Sometime in the month of Aug 06, I broke. It was a mental breakdown of sorts. No I did not lose my mind, but I lost my motivation. I lost my spirit. Being passionate about my work, about the technology that I am so keen in did not help.

Yes, I do not know the client style. I don't understand what they want. Why did they design it that way? Why did i do it this way? Why do we disagree on so many front? Why? Why? Why? When I start asking myself this, "Why do I even bother?", I know the end has come. I cannot in my clear conscience stay on. Cos I cannot contribute positively anymore. It is sapping away my passion. Slowly but surely.

Ideas attract ideas. It attract innovations too. It is fortunate, that I am able to meet up with people who are willing to share their ideas. An open discussion of ideas and not a presentation of ones skewed perception of events generated more ideas. If one cannot accept another person view then there is no point in the discussion. You talk and I listen. I gain your perception of things. Like Joan of ark. The messenger get skewered for the things she has to say.


Yes. I just wish I can drop and go. If not for the money, why would i continue to run on an empty heart. I know i cannot make progression here anymore. So I am going. Seven more weeks to go.
Such a long time. Countdown! Yeah!!